


A Very Intriguing Person

by AlexandrianSight



Category: Portal (Video Game)
Genre: College party au, F/F, Human AU, slight non-con
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-22
Updated: 2016-08-22
Packaged: 2018-08-10 07:52:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,337
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7836412
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AlexandrianSight/pseuds/AlexandrianSight
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i> "Who had a lock like that on the inside of their front door?" </i>
</p><p>AU where instead of a test subject trying to escape the facility, Chell is an introvert trying to escape a party. She encounters quite a few wacky characters in the process of finding the mysterious hostess, who is the only one with the key to the front door.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Very Intriguing Person

**Author's Note:**

> Loosely based off a tumblr post I saw (link below). I'm still working on the "Killing You is Hard" series, I just really wanted to write this. 
> 
> I managed to include all the cores and even Atlas and P-Body, even though almost no one has names lmao. Also, I left GLaDOS unnamed bc I just don't like "Gladys" even though it's the popular human au name for her. Sorry, it just doesn't sit well with me for some reason.

Based off of [this post](http://alexandriansight.tumblr.com/post/149303575908/jumpsuitedmonster-apertureratt-you-know)

 

Chell wondered how she’d gotten herself into this situation.

She looked around the huge apartment that was, by now, absolutely trashed by all of the other partygoers. Half of which were passed out for one reason or another. She didn’t know how the hostess was so calm as her place was being trashed like this. She supposed it was another thing that rich people didn’t need to care about.

Chell had stayed this long out of politeness. The hostess _had_ given her a personal invitation, whereas everyone else had said that they’d either heard about it online or by word of mouth. And Wheatley had convinced her it would be a good idea - a way to socialize and get out of her comfort zone.

“And who knows, maybe you’ll find yourself a girl,” He’d said.

But by now she figured she’d stayed long enough. Almost everyone who was still awake was doing more shots, singing _really_ bad karaoke, making out, dancing, or raiding the kitchen.

Plus, the hostess hadn’t spoken to her at all, other than greeting her when she walked in. Her voice was weird, too. It seemed to be a forced higher pitch and reminded Chell of the “customer service” voice she had to use at the store she worked at. Chell did, however, catch her watching her throughout the night. Like when she was standing slightly away from Wheatley and his other foreign exchange friends who were drunkenly arguing over soccer (“football”) teams. She’d been staring at the beer in her cup - a nasty brew, so much so that she’d only managed to drink one cup the entire night - when she looked up and spotted the hostess across the room, looking at her.

She was clearly in a conversation with some man and was much less engaged in it than he was. When Chell caught her staring, though, she quickly looked away and pretended to laugh at whatever the man had said.

Chell eyed the woman. She was beautiful - gorgeous, even. Chell recalled someone telling her that she was an upperclassman. There was an air of refinement about her. Her hair was long and wavy, reaching the small of her back with gentle curls. It was dyed a silvery white, which somehow made her look ethereal rather than old. She was wearing a white halter-neck crop top and high-waisted black jeans. Her expression was calm, rarely changing, with light amber eyes that seemed almost unnatural in color. She was clearly a makeup expert, unlike Chell, with perfectly contoured features and smoky eyeshadow. She was wearing a mauve lipstick and eyeliner “as sharp as her wit,” as one person had commented. Truth be told, Chell felt chills run down her spine whenever she was under her powerful gaze.

Compared to her, Chell felt like she was dressed inadequately. Her dark hair - which she’d recently chopped off into a bob - was straightened and framed around her face. She had on basic makeup with the addition of lip gloss, which had worn off within twenty minutes of arriving. Her outfit wasn’t anything special, either, just a tank top and jeans.

Chell wondered why she’d received a personal invitation - she didn’t even know this woman’s name. Did she know _her_ name? She’d seen her around campus a few times - the hair was hard to ignore - but they didn’t have classes together. Chell was a freshman, after all, and taking mostly introductory courses. She couldn’t figure out how the hostess had ever noticed her at all.

She was leaning against the wall, reflecting on the best way to make her escape, when she was shaken from her thoughts by a familiar voice.

“Well hello there, gorgeous.”

Chell closed her eyes and grimaced, hoping that when she opened them, Rick wouldn’t be there. She was sorely disappointed.

He had his arm up leaning against the wall, facing her with a smarmy grin on his face. He reeked of alcohol and she watched him look her up and down, eyeing her like a piece of meat.

“What do you  say we find a place a little more...private?” He asked, winking.

“Ugh,” Chell rolled her eyes and quickly moved to get away from him. He pursued, though, pushing past all the people she was weaving through. Then, everything happened so quickly that Chell wasn’t sure what she actually saw.

All she knew for certain was that she made eye contact with the hostess as she moved past her, then as Rick followed, he was suddenly pushed into another man, who was very obviously an angry drunk.

Chell turned to watch in alarm as the two men fell to the ground. The angry man quickly stood and started shouting at Rick, who was slowly trying to get a grip on what had happened. He grabbed Rick by his shirt and hoisted him up, shouting in his face.

“YOU GOT A PROBLEM, ASSHOLE?” Angry Guy shouted. “YOU THINK THIS IS SOME SORT OF FUCKING GAME?”

Still disoriented, Rick just stared at the man, who started violently shaking him.

“YOU WANNA FUCKING GO, MAN?! I’LL BEAT YOUR ASS,” He let go with one hand so he could point at all the onlookers. “I’LL TAKE ALL OF YOU! LET’S GO RIGHT NOW! I COULD BEAT YOU WITH MY HANDS TIED BEHIND MY BACK.”

Never one to turn down a challenge, Rick pushed the man away and managed to stay on his feet, swaying a bit. “If you want a fight, I’ve got your fight right here!” He slurred. “I’m a black belt in pretty much everything! I am a coiled spring right now. Tension and power. Just... I'm a muscle. Like a big arm muscle, punching through a brick wall, and it's hitting the wall so hard-”

He was interrupted when Angry Guy socked him in the jaw. Rick stumbled, his hand flying to his face. He wiped some blood off of his mouth, then looked at the other man. “Oh, you’ve got a big storm coming, buddy.”

With that, they both went at each other, grabbing each other’s shoulders and pushing, each occasionally trying to pull away to get a punch in. As far as fights went, it wasn’t very entertaining. The drunken crowd cheered them on, though. Eventually, they pushed each other so that they coffee table, knocking both of them out. The crowd continued cheering, not noticing that the fight was over. Chell rolled her eyes and glanced back to where the hostess was, only to find that she was gone.

Chell furrowed her brow. She wasn’t entirely sure, but it had looked like _she_ had been the one who pushed Rick into Angry Guy.

She brushed it off and moved into the other room, where Wheatley and his friends had managed to find a soccer game to watch on the TV. They were piled on the couch and shouting incoherently as the players pretended to be injured in order to run down the clock.

She glanced over at the other couch where some poor soul was passed out. She remembered seeing them there hours ago and wondered how much of a lightweight they were to have passed out so early.

She moved around to tap Wheatley on the shoulder, who ignored her, continuing to shout at the TV. She sighed at her best friend. Well, only friend, really. It was kind of sad too, considering that he was a foreign exchange student and therefore would be leaving at the end of the semester.

“Wheatley, it’s time to go-”

“AWWHH, COME ON! WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT? THAT WAS A BLOODY FOUL, THAT WAS!”

Chell sighed and repeated his name a few times until she got his attention.

“Eh, wha’ then?” He looked up at her, his eyes unfocused.

“I want to leave.”

“Why don’tcha go ‘head an’ leave then?” He slurred.

“We took _your_ car,” She said annoyedly.

“Ah, well- AWH, COME ON!”

Chell groaned as he got distracted by the game again. She started to ask him again, but he was completely engrossed in the game again. She sighed and grabbed his keys from his pocket, an act that went completely unnoticed by him. She put them in her pocket and walked with her arms crossed defensively through the massive apartment, weaving her way through people to get to the door.

She tried the door. Locked. Confused, she fiddled with the deadbolt lock and tried again. Still locked. She looked and saw that there was another lock on the inside, one that required a key. Perplexed, Chell just stared at the door, wondering who thought this was a good idea. She turned and looked around the entrance hall, unsure what exactly she was looking for.

Right, she thought. The hostess must have the key. She’ll just find her and-

Chell realized she had no idea where the woman had gone. She brushed this off, though. It would be easy to spot her hair, even amongst the partying crowd. Chell glanced at the stairs - why _was_ this apartment so large for just one person? She decided to check around the first floor before venturing up the stairs.

She moved into the kitchen. Inside was a man surrounded by others, shouting about how to correctly make a cake, along with other things.

“I cannnn m- hic! -make any cake! I sswear!” He shouted, pausing to drink more of his beer. “Name me a cake!” He gasped dramatically. “No! Forget the cake! I want salmon!” He forcefully put his drink down on the counter and started rooting through the freezer. Finding a salmon, he whipped it out and put it on the counter to defrost. The others simply watched as his eyes widened. “You know what’ll go _gooooood_ with this?” He turned and started going through the pantry before pulling out a jar of Nutella.

Chell left the room as Cake Guy started eating Nutella straight out of the jar with his fingers.

She passed through the room where people were poorly dancing along to whatever was on the Just Dance screen. One girl, who Chell recognized from some classes, spotted her and started twirling toward her. She wasn’t quite as drunk as everyone else, which was obvious in how she kept her balance. Chell also recalled that the girl once mentioned she was a dance major.

She grabbed Chell’s hands and started trying to dance with her.

“Heyyyyy!” The girl said. “We have classes together! You’re Chelsea, right?”

“Actually, it’s-”

Chell was cut off when the girl stopped dancing and gasped. She pointed at Chell’s necklace. “What’s _that_?”

Chell glanced down. “Oh, my dad gave this to me. It’s a camera aperture.”

“What’s _that_?”

“It’s, uh, the opening that light passes through-”

“What’s _that_ over there?”

Chell looked to see where the girl was pointing. “That’s a fern.”

Suddenly, the girl hugged her. “Chelsea, you’re my new best friend,” she sighed into Chell’s shirt.

Chell stood uncomfortably as the girl hugged her. A new song came on the TV, and she quickly let go so she could start dancing again, forgetting about her new best friend.

As she moved to leave, Chell was confronted by another classmate and their buddy. She had a few classes with these two. They were best friends, practically inseparable. They both had dyed hair, too. The taller one had bright orange while the shorter one had blue hair.

Like everyone else, the two were also very drunk. The shorter one - what was their name? She felt like it started with an ‘A’ - held out a small grey cube with a pink heart on it, leaning in close.

“Listen,” They said, leaning in closer. “Take this, and no matter what, don’t lose it.”

Chell hesitantly took the cube as the two started giggling. Orange smacked Blue on the back - a little too hard - sending them forward a few steps. Blue turned around and bopped their friend on the head.

Chell took a moment to investigate the cube and discovered that it was actually a box. There was a lock on it, though, making it inaccessible to her. She wasn’t sure why, but she decided to hold onto it like Blue had said.

She quickly moved on to the next room, still looking for the hostess, who had mysteriously disappeared. She found herself in a throng of drunken dancers, dancing to actual party music rather than Just Dance. It was hard to see anything in here, and she found herself being pushed and grinded on. She quickly extracted herself and moved to the wall at the edge of the room, holding the box tight and inspecting the crowd in search of the hostess. A couple pushed up against the wall right next to her, making out. She quickly moved away, muttering something about personal space.

“Did you say space?” She heard a voice say.

She looked around to see another guy next to her, looking like an excited puppy. He had been leaning against the wall instead of dancing, but she somehow hadn’t noticed him.

“I _love_ space,” He said. “I’m gonna go to space one day. Gonna go to space. Man, I love space.” He wasn’t talking to her anymore but was now just talking in general, his eyes out of focus.

A little creeped out, Chell quickly left the room. She looped around the rest of the apartment - counting at least four TVs - and found that Wheatley and his friends had all passed out. She sighed and kept moving, eventually finding herself back in the kitchen, with no sign of the hostess.

Cake Guy was now sitting on the floor, surrounded by cans of tuna. He was struggling with a can opener, dramatically sobbing and cursing. Chell was alarmed to see actual tears running down his face. He sob-shouted something about figuring out the perfect cake recipe. She didn’t want to know about any cake recipe that involved twelve cans of tuna.

The crowd that had been in here was gone now except for one guy, who was sitting on a barstool with a textbook in front of him and a beer in both hands, spewing out facts that Chell was sure weren’t true.

Taking pity on Cake Guy, she crouched down and took the can and can opener out of his hands, scrunching up her nose as she opened the tuna. When she handed him the open can, he stared at her like she was an angel sent down from heaven above. Feeling a bit uncomfortable, Chell stood up again and went back to the entryway. She eyed the stairs again and sighed as she started to climb them. She didn’t like invading people’s privacy, and the upstairs had an off-limits feel to it, but she didn’t seem to have any other choice.

Luckily, most of the doors were open or partially open, allowing Chell to see the rooms. An office. A gaming room. She peeked around an almost-closed door and quickly withdrew when she saw a couple on the bed.

She sighed, massaging the bridge of her nose. She just wanted to leave, why was this so complicated? Who had a lock like that on the inside of their front door?

Her thoughts were interrupted when she heard a flush and saw someone exit the bathroom near her. The man had disheveled hair and stubble. He looked just as surprised to see her.

He smiled and held out his hand. “Hi, I’m Dou- My box!”

Startled, Chell held up the box. “This is yours?”

“Yes! I’ve been looking for that for _hours_!”

She handed him the box, noticing that he didn’t seem drunk at all, despite his excitable behavior. Once it was in his hands, he sighed with relief. Then, he looked at her with suspicion. “You didn’t open it, did you?”

She shook her head. “There’s a lock.”

He laughed. “Right, right,” He stopped, standing awkwardly. “Are you enjoying her party?”

“Actually, I was just trying to leave,” Chell explained.

He looked at her suspiciously. “Well, the door is _downstairs_ …”

“It’s locked,” She said defensively. “There’s some stupid lock on the inside that requires a key.”

“Oh!” Doug said. “Well, I can help you with that.”

“You can?”

“Of course! I live here, after all.”

Chell was taken aback. “You _live_ here? But I thought-”

“That it was just _her_ here? Yeah, no,” He laughed uneasily. “I’m her roommate. Unfortunately. I, uh, wasn’t exactly invited to the party, though. But I can help you out! I may be stuck here, but you deserve to get out.”

She sighed with relief. “Thank you so much.”

“Oh, it’s no problem, no problem,” He said. “I’ve got the key, uh,” He rifled through his pockets, patting himself down. “Uh.” He disappeared into what Chell assumed was his room.

A few minutes later, he came back out, looking downtrodden. “I, uh, can’t seem to find my key…”

“You _what?_ ”

“I’m really sorry,” He said sheepishly.

Chell pinched the bridge of her nose. “No, it’s fine, thanks for trying. Do you know where I can find her?”

He sighed and shook his head. “No idea.”

“Thanks anyway,” She turned and headed back down the stairs. “I hope you find your key,” She said over her shoulder.

“I hope you manage to escape.”

She scoffed in laughter as he said this, making it back down the stairs. The entryway was filled with couples making out. She quickly moved back into the kitchen, where Cake Guy was now passed out with tuna all over his face. She wrinkled her nose at the smell, moving past Fact Guy, who was still spewing out incorrect facts, but more slowly now.

Space Guy was in here, too. Spotting her, he grabbed her shoulders excitedly. “What’s your favorite thing about space?” He leaned in closer. “Mine’s space.”

“Oookay.” Chell grabbed his wrists and pulled his hands off her shoulders so she could get away.

She moved back into the Just Dance room and was immediately spotted by the dancing girl.

“Chelsea!” She shouted over ‘Livin La Vida Loca.’

She ran over and threw her arms around Chell, more drunk than before. She pulled away with a grin and went back to dancing.

Chell turned to keep moving when she bumped into someone. She started to apologize when she realized it was Rick, who was somehow revived from his fight.

“Therrrre you are, gorgeous,” He muttered before pushing her against the wall and kissing her.

Stunned, Chell stood there, unable to move. She quickly regained control of herself, though, and started trying to push him away. He clutched onto her tighter, though, biting her lip so that it started to bleed. His mouth tasted like blood and liquor. She started to panic when he was suddenly pulled off of her.

Gasping for air and still leaning against the wall, Chell watched as her rescuer slapped Rick across the face.

“Woah, hey! What’s the problem?” He asked, rubbing his cheek. “We were just having a good time.”

“She was definitely _not_ enjoying herself,” A low, murderous voice answered.

Chell blinked as she recognized the woman. It was the mysterious hostess.

“Well what we do ain’t really any of your business, now, is it, angel?”

Chell caught a glimpse of the fury in her eyes as her hand shot out, striking his nose with the heel of her hand. Rick collapsed for the second time that night. Chell stared at him in disbelief even as the woman grabbed her by the wrist and dragged her out of the room and up the stairs.

She led her into what Chell assumed was her room. She sat Chell down on the edge of the bed before disappearing into the adjoining bathroom. She came back out with a damp paper towel, offering it to her.

“Here,” She said, her voice returning to the emotionless tone Chell had heard earlier. “For your lip.”

Still recovering from mild shock, Chell slowly took the paper towel and pressed it to her lip as the woman sat down next to her. The cold water felt good on her injury.

“Thanks,” she muttered, looking around the room. It was very clean and minimalistic.

“Are you...okay?” The woman asked, looking more confused than concerned.

“Hm? Oh, yeah,” Chell said dismissively. “I’ve dealt with a busted lip before.”

She looked perplexed. “I meant with that _imbecile_ -”

“Oh!” Chell felt stupid for not realizing what she meant. “No- yeah, I’m fine.” She nodded affirmatively and went back to observing the room, readjusting the paper towel on her lip. She could feel the woman watching her and felt her face slowly flush. She suddenly remembered her goal.

“I was looking for you, actually,” Chell turned back to face her.

“Were you?”

“Yeah, I-” Chell stopped, feeling embarrassed. “I was actually trying to leave. But your door was, uh, locked.” She lowered the paper towel, noticing her lip had stopped bleeding.

The woman looked down at her hands in her lap. “Oh. Right. I actually locked it. To keep you in.”

Chell stared at her in bewilderment, stunned into silence.

She continued to speak, her face as expressionless as her voice. “You’re a very...intriguing person. I know we rarely see each other on campus and you probably don’t even know my name, but I’ve been...observing you.” She quickly moved to defend herself. “Not in any creepy way, of course. Just, for example, whenever I _do_ see you on campus, I just observe you in the moment. Who you’re with, what general direction you’re heading. Until you’re out of sight.”

Chell continued to watch her, still not speaking.

“And tonight, I kept wanting to talk to you, but you were always far across the room, or dealing with drunken morons. That’s just an excuse, of course. It eventually got to the point where you were probably the only other person here capable of intelligible conversation and I still didn’t approach you. I hid up here instead. And then I finally convinced myself to approach you, and I found you in a...less than ideal situation.”

The two sat in silence for a moment until Chell regained her voice. She turned towards the woman. “Why?”

She turned away, but Chell could still see that she was blushing. Chell was startled, having rarely seen her with anything but a cool, calm expression.

Still not facing Chell, she replied, “I told you, you’re a very intriguing person.” She crossed her arms defensively, fidgeting as though she was inwardly fighting with herself. “And...you have very pretty eyes,” She murmured so that Chell could barely hear her.

Chell found herself breathless at hearing a compliment from someone with such an ethereal beauty. She felt heat creep up into her face and looked away.

“These kinds of things aren’t very easy for me,” The woman said.

Chell turned back to see that she was watching her again. The heat on her face lingered even as she tried to diffuse the tension. “Well, you know, I think that most people would try getting to know someone a bit more before holding them hostage in their house.”

She stared at Chell for a few moments before the joke registered, then threw her head back in laughter. Chell was amazed - she honestly couldn’t imagine a more beautiful laugh. The fact that she had cracked this woman’s emotionless façade felt like a major accomplishment. For some reason, Chell found it almost endearing that she had gone to such lengths just for a chance to talk to her. It was an odd way of showing affection, but it was certainly better than, say, Rick’s approach.

Chell looked down at her hands in her lap, then at the woman’s hands. They looked pale and fragile. It was hard to imagine that it was the same hand that knocked Rick out just a few minutes ago. She took a breath, gathering up the nerve to speak.

“How about tomorrow - if we both survive this party - we meet up for coffee at that place on University? I’ve never been there before,” Chell added.

Her nose wrinkled in disgust. “Black Mesa Café? Ugh, their coffee is disgusting, you don’t want to go there. I know a little bakery with _much_ better coffee. Here,” She took out her phone. “What’s your number? I’ll text you the address.”

Chell gave her her number and soon received a text.

 

**2035 Johnson Ave.**

**9 o’clock sharp.**

**Or else.**

 

Chell smiled at her phone before sighing and glancing towards the door. “I really should get going,” She said. “It’s already two and I have a date in the morning.”

The woman smiled and the two got up. She led her past all the drunk partygoers and to the front door, unlocking it so Chell could leave. Chell turned back, leaning against the doorframe and ignoring the party in the background.

“So, nine a.m. sharp?” She asked.

The woman nodded. “Or else.”

Chell grinned. “I’ll be there.”

She turned and left, taking Wheatley’s car back to her apartment. When she got home, she collapsed on her bed for a few minutes, letting the events of the evening soak in. She opened up her text messages just to make sure that the address was still there. She went to save the woman’s number in her contacts when she realized that she’d never learned her name. Chell laughed a little before locking her phone and collapsing into her pillow again.

She supposed she should thank Wheatley at some point in the next few days. He had been the one to convince her to go to the party, after all. Even if he had been a jerk the whole night, he had been right about one thing.

_“Maybe you’ll find yourself a girl.”_

Deciding to shower in the morning because she was too tired, Chell rolled over and eventually fell asleep, realizing as she drifted off that she hadn’t stopped smiling since she’d left the party.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for the read! Please feel free to leave any feedback or questions in the comments section below.
> 
> You can also find me at [alexandriansight.tumblr.com](alexandriansight.tumblr.com)


End file.
